We are living in a time of irreality. We aren't seeing reality for what it is, but projecting what we want to see upon what is around us. It is easier to do so because of the fact that we have much more at our disposal than before which softens the blows of our poor choices. But this abundance is an illusion because at the end of the day, we still are not in control of anything, especially our decline and mortality.
This means that if we really want to make any progress in our lives, with our health, with our wellbeing, in our relationships, we have to see things as they are - not as we imagine them to be. In any given situation, we should try to understand the real elements at play. This means ignoring our tendencies to protect and defend ourselves and our faulty behaviors, in favor of unflinching objectivity - no matter the pain - towards every detail of what played out, or is playing out. When we are brutally honest with our realities, we can begin to fix what is wrong with them.
It is not an intuitive process, to want to see ourselves in a brutal light. But it is only in doing so, in recognizing that our flaws create our realities, that we can begin to do the work of correcting what is guiding us astray. Our built-in tendencies to self-protect, while seeming to be helpful mechanisms to making us feel less bad, are exactly the opposite of what is needed in life for progress. Sometimes we need to feel terrible to begin acknowledging how truly unhappy we are with reality. Through this acknowledgement, we can begin to organically and properly change things. You cannot fix something unless you really know what is wrong; and you cannot know what is wrong if you're denying the truth.
It is important in life to be real; to want reality and to desire the truth at all costs. We should try hard not to contribute to describing reality in false ways. To live in a real world, to know that you are seeing things in a clear and sensible way, allows the best chance for meaningful progress.